Denim upgrade

I was about to buy a new pair of Gap Long and Lean jeans to replace a pair that wore out, when I saw this post warning women off Gap jeans. The blogger, who I think does fashion consulting for a living, tried on every single Gap fit and style, and posted pictures comparing them to her recommended brands. I'm convinced! (Especially since I remember how much I loved my Lucky jeans, which were my only pair of high-end jeans ever, but which now have a big hole in the knee and give me major muffin top.)  But now I need to go try on a million pairs until I find a brand and style that fits my post-baby-#2 body... my most hated shopping task. Prepare to see some phone pictures of my butt. (Wearing jeans.)

Butt butt butt

Via Metafilter.

Best Science Fiction and Fantasy Books of 2012

Mr. Penumbra's 24-Hour Bookstore made this list!  Now I'm even more excited to read it.  Most of the books on the list look pretty good.  I recently read and enjoyed The Dog Stars, so am inclined to give the list some credibility.

Oven Steaks

Have you ever tried this oven-to-pan method of making steak?  I've tried it twice and gotten fantastic results both times -- the meat stays so juicy and tender.  I wonder if it would also work with pork chops (bringing the internal temperature higher, of course).

Color palette

Emily Henderson on choosing a color palette, via Apartment Therapy. I am terrible at this kind of thing, and found it really helpful that she included picture examples, both good and bad. (Especially the bad ones helped -- it's hard for me to look at a nice room and figure out why I like it.)

Elf on the Shelf

I have never heard of this before.  Is it really that big of a phenomenon?

Also, I can't think of a better way to give a kid nightmares than to put a creepy elf doll on a shelf, tell him the elf is watching him all the time, and put it in a different place every day so the kid knows it has moved in the night.

Experience Gifts

I love the idea of gifting experiences, especially for the many people for whom it's hard to choose "stuff" (because they're picky, or always buy the things they want for themselves, or don't like material possessions, or whatever).

Comics by Madeleine Flores

I like this whole Tumblr by Madeleine Flores.

Google Art Project

Google Art Project.

Shopstyle

Have you seen this website, shopstyle.com? I love the interface and how you can pick things accordingly to how deeply on sale they are.

Pinterest verification

This columnist tries out recipes from Pinterest and report back on whether they work. Here's her take on edible glitter (bad) and homemade Cheez-Its (good).

Wallpaper

I'm loving the wallpaper patterns on this site.  Expensive, though!

Five books

Website where every day, they have an expert tell you the five books you should read to learn all about a given topic.

NYC chocolate tour

From the author of Candyblog. I need to remember some of these places for next time! And I had no idea there's now a branch of L. A. Burdick in Manhattan.

Hide-a-Squirrel

Is it wrong to buy a dog toy for your kid? I think X would like this.

Very Important Post

Here.

99 Life Hacks

Some of these are pretty clever!  I want to go home and try the trick for unknotting a plastic bag.

The Compact

This anti-consumerism movement is an interesting idea.  Members promise not to buy anything new for a year.  I like the concept, but don't think I'd want to do it.

Opinionated Voting Machines

In honor of Election Day 2012, here is a YouTube video of something pretty awful if it's for real.

Yet another reason why mail-in ballots are the best thing ever.  I didn't fill mine out in time to mail it back, but when S and I biked to our polling place this morning, I could just drop it off while he had to wait half an hour in line.

MIT Gangnam Style

Have you seen this video yet?

Dog Confessions

This made me laugh.

The Ansonia

According to Wikipedia, The Ansonia (a hotel on the Upper West Side) had a rooftop farm back in the early 20th century that "included about 500 chickens, many ducks, about six goats and a small bear."  Dairy cows could be stabled on the roof.  A bellhop would bring free fresh eggs to hotel inhabitants every morning.  Can you even imagine?

Lately I am in need of gruntling

http://gruntle.me/
Try it, it really works.

Filial Piety

Parents, fly your kids to Asia to attend a rally like this!

Do you have any questions for me

Useful list of questions to ask at interviews.

Ruler of Everything

Ever since my sister introduced us to Tally Hall during her last visit, we've been listening to them a lot.  This song reminds me a bit of They Might Be Giants.

Color personality test

Color personality test (via AT). The results are oddly specific.

Primer

Does primer (the kind you put on your face before foundation) actually do anything? I have two little tubes of samples, and I use them occasionally, but I see no difference.

Belt style

Did you know that wide belts are not recommended for short-waisted women?  Every article I've read seems to agree that short-waisted women should wear skinny belts or no belts, and definitely no belts in outfit-contrasting colors.

... this is after I just bought three non-returnable wide belts.  Two in bright contrast colors.

Also, the American Apparel site is full of topless women.  (If you would like to see one, try the "nail polish" section and scroll through the images at the top.  It was not what I was expecting to see when shopping online for nail polish.)

Pinterest

I follow this coworker on Pinterest and she seems obsessed with stuff for her future kids. Pretty weird since they don't exist yet, yet she has nearly a hundred (!) pins on her future kids board. I think Pinterest is a lot less revealing than FB in general, but clearly not if you happen to have an interest that doesn't show up in your daily life.

Blast from the past

I went to middle school with this girl.  Apparently she now designs luxury handbags, parties with the prince of Monaco, and dances on banquettes in St. Tropez.

Worst movie death scene ever.

Here.

Boo Scientists

Apparently both male and female scientists think less of job candidates for being female.

Better than Build-A-Bear

Cute idea!  I'm going to add this to my list of potential gifts for kids.

Older moms live longer

According to this Psychology Today post: "The New England Centenarian Study conducted by Boston University Medical Center found that women who give birth after 40 were four times more likely to live to 100 or longer than were women who gave birth at younger ages."

The Manolo on first-world problems

I always love the Manolo, but this one really made me laugh.

"Ballers of History: Abraham Lincoln"

I never knew Lincoln facts #2 and #3!

David Rees

I had never heard of David Rees, but it turns out he is awesome. Check out "Relationshapes" and the part about his pencil-sharpening business.

XKCD on ADD

If this is accurate, I have ADD too. Actually, I think every woman I know might have it.

Pacu fish

If you go swimming in Illinois, make sure to wear an iron codpiece.

Pediatric cardiac transplant

Written by a pediatric cardiothoracic surgeon (remember when CC wanted to be one?).

"There are certainly more difficult procedures in congenital cardiac surgery to perform than a heart transplant, but few freighted with more anticipation. After all, the heart that we are asking to sustain our patient started off this morning in another child."

Interesting, sad, and miraculous.

A bit of midweek cheer

I was touched by many of these, and picture #21 = instant happiness.

Art for Children

Art for Children series by Ernest Lloyd Raboff, introducing children to some of the great artists. It looks like they're out of print, but relatively easy to find.

That's why you have a wife.

"Asked, 'Do you think that having children then is difficult to manage with being a scientist?' one physicist said, 'No, absolutely not. That’s why you have a wife.'"

Nothing particularly new here.  But I did find it interesting to read an article like this focusing on scientists.  Especially since ambitious scientists often marry other ambitious scientists.

BIL and TED

I love that there is a companion/reaction conference to TED named BIL.

The Story of a Story

Journalism Tumblr. I found it through the website of the great journalist Amy Wallace.

Another useful style post

This one is on creating style "use cases" so that you have the right clothes for all of the different contexts that you need to wear them in.

Notch on patents

Notch (developer of Minecraft): "If you own a software patent, you should feel bad."

Bonobos

Current obsession: bonobos!  Did you know that they can communicate with humans using panels of lexigrams, have matriarchal societies, and have never been witnessed killing each other?  And check out this video of a bonobo father playing with his son:

Another one:

Oh, Singapore...

I know what's going on our late night playlist...

Club Getaway

This place sounds like fun... if we were still 20.

Homonymic marriage

I loved <a href="http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2012/08/couples_with_the_same_first_name_gay_marriage_and_homonymy_.2.html">this article</a> about couples with the same first name -- hilarious, but with an optimistic message.

More goat

This time as decor.

Silhouettes

Silhouette cutters. They do it very quickly, and freehand! (And they're available for weddings, but in the UK.)

Bear rescue

This is amazing... couple rescues baby bears trapped in a dumpster.

My questions are, who was taking the video, and if the bears managed to climb up into the dumpster, why couldn't they climb out again? Also, it's kind of weird how the mama bear makes no effort to help and starts walking away without looking back as soon as the first cub is out.

Non-cow milk

Interesting article about why cow's milk is so widespread.

My favorite line:

"Lee crept up on the sows while they were sleeping, frantically pinched at their tiny nipples, then ran away when they woke up and started to freak out."

Polar bear man

Less creepy.  Or maybe more creepy, depending on whom you ask.

Goat man

Goat man spotted on a mountaintop.

Big Island

We're going to Hawaii (the Big Island) next week!  I'm so excited.  We'll spend a couple days on the eastern coast and check out the volcanoes and rain forests, then have a cross-island driving adventure and spend four days at a resort on the western coast snorkeling and kayaking and relaxing.

S and I have been talking a lot of vacation philosophy lately.  We're at two opposite extremes -- I tend to overplan and overschedule trips, whereas he likes to just show up and let things happen.  My way lets us pack more interesting experiences into the time we have, but isn't very relaxing.  His way is more relaxing but also can lead to missed opportunities and wasted time/money.  We're trying to hit a happy medium.

Two non-related thoughts

Apparently Brown made it onto Futurama!

Also, this sounds like hell.  To be formally judged on your looks, wardrobe, likability, and potential for success would be bad enough now, let alone as an emotionally raw college freshman.

Fashion attempts

1. Makeup brushes: I got a $10 EcoTools set from RiteAid. I like it! My makeup looks better and lasts longer, and applying it is neater and more fun. Thumbs up to makeup brushes.

2. In the comments to this Corporette post on scuffed shoes (guilty), someone suggests using a Sharpie to touch up the shoes. I tried it. It looks pretty terrible, but it's an improvement as long as no one looks closely. I hope I can cover it up with shoe polish. If I ever bother to use shoe polish.

PhD in law

Fully funded, with health insurance! I would love to do this. (But purely for fun. I don't think I have what it takes to be a law professor.)

Club Unicorn

Fascinating post by a gay Mormon man who has been happily married to a woman for ten years.

I had a little bit of trouble wrapping my head around "gay" and "extremely healthy and robust sex life [with someone of the opposite gender]," but understood it better when I tried to imagine whether I could have a similar relationship with a woman if I felt with all my heart that it was the "right" thing to do (another hard concept to wrap my head around).  I think I could.

Art by Nagai Hideyuki

These are pretty neat.  It would be interesting to see a video where the camera circles one of these pieces, to see what it looks like when you're not at the right angle.

Art by David Fullarton

I Can't Apologize Enough
 
What I Do at Work When I'm Supposed to Be Working

Humidity

... is an East Coast phenomenon I'd forgotten during my time out west.  I keep on looking in the mirror and wondering why my face is so shiny and my hair is so frizzy.

Also forgotten: that you can wear shorts and short-sleeved shirts at night here.

Strawberry rhubarb

I heard somewhere that strawberry and rhubarb actually aren't meant to go together and have different growing seasons, but that there is a variety of rhubarb called "strawberry rhubarb" because of its color, and people started making recipes containing strawberry and rhubarb because they thought both were supposed to be included.

News in Slow Spanish

During my commute, I've been listening to this podcast called "News in Slow Spanish." (I think they also have News in Slow French.) They speak Spanish about half the normal speed, so it's much easier to understand if you're less-than-fluent. There are two people talking and after each news segment they have a conversation about it. In the second half of the podcast, they also have sections on grammar ("una sección fascinante y estimulante!"), common phrases, and myths and legends from Latin America.

I learned that "abeja" means "bee." I was so confused because they joked that a spelling bee winner had "worked hard like a little [abeja]" and went on to say other things about "abejas" but I thought they said "oveja" which means sheep. I kept listening to that part, trying to understand it. Now I know: abeja, oveja. Not the same.

There was also an interesting story on the myths and legends part called "La Sagrada Hoja de Coca" (the sacred coca leaf). The Sun God couldn't stop a tribe in the Andes from getting invaded by the Spanish conquistadors, but he did give them the gift of the coca leaf to alleviate their pain and give them peace. It was a gift that the conquistadors could not take away because it would have the opposite effect on them.

Portrait of Lotte

Everyone else in the world has probably already seen this video (which is described as "viral," after all), but I saw it for the first time today.  One of the things that struck me most is how the girl can look so much older and younger within the same biological year.

WE MUST GET RID OF OUR WINDOW FAN IMMEDIATELY.

Shocking news from South Korea!

Moto Kitchen

"Square watermelons are really cool because you take a watermelon, put it into a plastic box and play classical music on opposing sides of the watermelon. The audio vibrations will actually straighten out the water molecules that match the earth's magnetic polarity. It produces a watermelon that some say is 50 to 80 percent sweeter than a regular watermelon."


Huh?


A kitchen lab farm does sound pretty awesome, though.

Bowl of Worms

I kind of want to try this.  But I don't want to eat them.

Tuesday Night Fever

On the way to the airport to pick up my sister last Tuesday night, S and I were listening to a 70's radio station.  I saw the airport exit coming up on the right and pointed to the sign.  S didn't respond.  I pointed again, more insistently.  We missed the exit.

Me: "Why didn't you take the airport exit??"
S: "What?  I thought you were disco dancing!"

Ponytail

http://eatmorebikes.tumblr.com/post/24843519211

The Incredibly Attractive Student Population at MIT, etc.

Really liking this year's MIT commencement address...

Story rules

From the Pixar blog, via Metafilter.

Authenticity

Insightful comment on Apartment Therapy (original post links to NYT article about excessive use of props in decor):

I read an interesting book called The Authenticity Hoax that I think hits some of the same themes as this article. We're living in a time when people are striving to be authentic -- picking unique vintage props and "curating" them -- yet also painstakingly documenting it all for other peoples' consumption. How authentic can the efforts be when it's all for the praise and approval of others? Clearly it's more nuanced than that, but the overall impact of blogging on or daily lives probably can't even be calculated right now.

I'm also always curious how history will remember this time. When someone throws a 2010's party decades from now, will they mockingly decorate with globes and serve drinks in mason jars?

Putting together outfits

I love this idea of putting outfits together by picking out a group of core items and then mixing them in different ways, but I don't think I'll ever be organized (or care) enough to actually plan all these things out in advance.

Reclining on planes

Do you recline your seat on planes?  Every time I come across the topic of reclining airplane seats, I'm startled by the violence of people's opinions.  Until quite recently, it would never have occurred to me that reclining is considered so rude by so many people.  I don't usually do it myself since I prefer sitting upright, but I fully expect everyone else to.  My lack of awareness on this issue is probably a privilege of being on the shorter side; apparently taller people find it very painful when the seat in front of them is reclined.

Come to think of it, tall S has complained about knee pain on flights from reclining seats, and usually springs for an economy plus seat to avoid the issue.  But I don't think it's ever occurred to him that the person in front of him shouldn't recline... or that he himself shouldn't.

I guess I don't really understand the vehemence of either side of the debate because the whole thing seems so murky and conditional.  To the proponents of the "NO ONE SHOULD RECLINE, EVER" school of thought: what about on overnight flights?  What if the person in front of you and the person behind you are reclined?  What if the person behind you is a small child who doesn't need the legroom?  To the proponents of the "RECLINING IS MY GOD-GIVEN RIGHT" school of thought... well, that's just asinine if you know you're hurting the person behind you.

Doesn't it seem like an aircraft shouldn't be equipped with buttons that passengers can use to cause each other pain, and that create so much bad will between people who are stuck within a foot or two of each other for hours?

Brooklyn hipster

An acquaintance has a boyfriend that many of my friends dislike.  As I haven't met the guy, I was curious as to why he provoked such a widespread negative reaction.  One friend told me, "It's because he's so Brooklyn."  Another clarified, "Brooklyn hipster."  


I am not hip enough to know what that means off the bat, or why being a hipster is bad.  Also, this is apparently a hard thing to explain to someone who is not hip enough to get it.  One exasperated friend finally forwarded me the guy's current facebook status:


"My first reaction was 'I'm going to throw up in my mouth now,' but then I realize that this is a zero-sum situation. Kind of like that Spiderman/U2 thing, except I care even less."


... Okay, I get it now.

Beek

Did you know "beek" means "to bask in the sun?"
I learned that in the elevator.

You say tudou and I say malingshu... you say xihongshi and I say fanqie...

The title of this post is never going to catch on as a jazz standard, is it?

I learned today that my brother and sister don't speak the same Chinese as me.  This shocked me more than it probably should have -- I learned most of my verbal Chinese from our Taiwanese parents at home and they learned most of theirs from mainland Chinese teachers in college.  But until today, I thought Mandarin was Mandarin -- people from different regions will have different accents, of course, but the words will be the same, right?  APPARENTLY NOT.

My brother and sister use different words than I do for: potato, bike, pineapple, and spoon, among others.  These are not uncommon words.  How did I never realize this until today?

Bizarro Trousers

Oddly enough, another pair of law buddies had the same idea we did at around the same time, only their blog went viral and we panic when someone finds ours.

Sewing machine

Do you own a sewing machine?
I keep seeing these tutorials on things that look simple and that I currently send out to a tailor, like hemming pants. And I think, maybe I should get a sewing machine.
Then again, I have a feeling that my sewing machine would end up sitting idle.
But I can't go through my entire life without a sewing machine, right? Eventually I will acquire one.
What do you think, is a sewing machine an inevitable necessity of grown-up life?

Sick after stress

Spent yesterday sick at home.  I was expecting to get sick, since I'm winding up a super-busy month at work and history shows that I almost always get sick right after a long period of stress or excitement.  Curious as to whether this is a common medical phenomenon, I googled "sick after stress" and found a zillion articles saying that, yes, this is a well-established thing.  One article had a scientific explanation:


"The stress onset may have caused his cortisol levels to rise, suppressing his immune system. In its weakened state, he may have been exposed to a variety of pathogens, which were then able to enter and proliferate within his body. Although this pathogen may have been present, his immune system was also constantly being signaled by cortisol to suppress inflammation, explaining why he didn’t see any symptoms during his exams. However, after his exams were over, the combination of pathogens living in his body along with absence of the anti-inflammatory signal may together have caused him to experience symptoms of the inflammatory response—sore throat, stuffy nose, and fever."


It makes evolutionary sense.  If your body is busy fight-or-flighting, you probably don't have time to nap and drink chicken soup.

Travel with a guru

From the NY Times.

My parents actually did this -- drove their guru around the country. I never really got the whole guru/disciple thing. He was a remarkable guy, though. One of those people who, if you met him once for two minutes, would remember you years later and ask about something specific that you had mentioned. It wasn't really clear to me until years later who he was. I just knew he was some sort of religious guy, and when he came to town we all went to see him.

I think it would be fun to be a guru. In the article, the author says that she waits anxiously from some word from her guru, and once in a rare while she is rewarded by some life-changing instruction. Can you imagine going around answering people's questions, and every once in a while just turning to someone and saying, "Move to Tibet."

The Pleasures of Oversharing

This explains so much.

Novel use for fridge magnets

Ask MeFi comment:

I went through a phase with my husband where we each had magnets on the fridge that indicated how interested in sex we were on a given day (maybe I read about that on here, actually?). High up meant I'm ready; down near the bottom meant don't touch me. Every morning they were put back in the middle of the fridge. Middle meant no strong feelings either way. It helped because it meant I didn't have to say no to advances and it made me think about sex.

Detox Diet: Luxe Edition

A family friend recently wrote a whole bunch of blog posts about her experiences on this detox diet (mostly complaining about being hungry and craving sweets, but she did say the food was good).  She did the 21-day "Comprehensive Plan," which includes three meals and two snacks a day.  It's not cheap -- $1092 -- but it sounds so nice to have tasty, nutritious meals and snacks laid out for you every day.  No planning, no shopping, no decisions.  Like a 105-course prix fixe meal that lasts for three weeks.

How wives should undress in front of their husbands

I think my favorite part of this 1937 photo series is the existence of "The Allen Gilbert School of Undressing" (if it's actually real).

Annoyed

NOT COOL to tell people they have to fly cross-country for a two-hour meeting, then, after they've made all their plans and arranged pet care/childcare/transportation/etc., tell them days before departure that the meeting has been pushed back a month. :(

"Professor Mix-a-Lot could not be reached for comment."

"'SHIRI' is a buttocks humanoid robot that expresses various emotions with organic movement of the artifical muscles."  By far the best internet find of the day.

Amazon owns everything

I guess this is old news -- how did I not know this until now? Amazon owns Zappos?? (AND Endless? And don't they also own 6pm.com? So they pretty much own every shoe site?)

This article on Amazon's foray into high fashion says so.

I ordered from Diapers.com recently, and then realized Amazon owns that too. Which is weird because I think of Zappos and Diapers.com as competing with Amazon. They all have such different prices and models.

Bra fitting

It wasn't the life-changing experience that I had hoped.

She took a couple of quick measurements, confirmed that I am the size I thought I was, and brought a bunch of things for me to try on, one of which I really liked. The rest didn't quite fit right. I tried a few different sizes and my usual size worked the best. The store I went to had normal department-store brands -- Maidenform, Wacoal, Bali, etc. -- so maybe the experience would be different at a higher-end place.

The lesson I learned was: figure out what you're looking for in terms of material, coverage, padding, etc., and then try on every single bra that matches what you're looking for, and maybe some of them will fit. Even within the same brand, there were huge variations. Also, tightening or loosening the straps makes a big difference. Obviously I have the straps adjusted on the ones I own, but when I'm trying them on sometimes I don't bother.

I have a feeling the women who say, "All this time, I've been wearing the wrong size!" are considerably better-endowed than me.

So at least I know that I should stop just grabbing something off the rack at Target, and I should spend some time at Macy's trying on lots of different bras.

Nature's Ice Cream

This seems unlikely ever to be a staple of the CM/JW household, but for the record, I tried it recently and liked it a lot!  Especially with a hearty sprinkle of nutmeg.  I wonder if something similar could be done with avocado and maybe some honey.

I'm gonna drink Butter Shots, I'm gonna sing a lot a lot

This comment was on Chowhound:
Another great use for the marshmallow skin is as an impromptu shot glass. Pull the browned mallow off the uncooked inside, gently place in your mouth with the hole facing up/out. Tilt your head back and have a willing accomplice fill the mallow glass (currently held in your mouth) with butter ripple schnapps or Irish cream. And then drop the whole boozy, toasty, caramelized concoction into your mouth. Classy.

Toasted marshmallow + Butter Shots? Genius!

Male Avengers

This made me laugh.  And nod.

ZOMBIES, RUN!

My brother has been eyeing this game.  I like the idea of having a "reason" to run, but am not sure that escalating zombie moans would be my running soundtrack of choice.

Tuna

My office suddenly smells like tuna!
Did someone sneak in and dump a tuna sandwich in my garbage when I was picking up my printouts?
Or maybe someone is eating one just outside.
Yuck.

Samoyeds

My brother and I are obsessed with Samoyeds recently.  We send each other pictures all day.  Look at these puppies!  Don't they look like tiny bears?

Wardrobe Manager

If I'm ever rich, I will hire a Wardrobe Manager.  My Wardrobe Manager (WM) will know my taste, coloring, and the dimensions of my body as well as I do, or better, and will shop often and judiciously for pieces that might work with my wardrobe.  Once a month or so, we will have a grand fitting session where I will try on all the pieces the WM has picked out, and s/he will show me how to mix and match the pieces we decide to keep with other items in my closet to put together complete outfits.  The WM will also have mad tailoring skills and will be able to hem, take in, or otherwise adapt articles of clothing to fit me perfectly.

If we're talking ideal world, the WM will also be in charge of wardrobe cleaning and care.  S/he will take care of ironing and dry cleaning runs (which means I might actually be willing to buy clothes that need to be ironed or dry cleaned) and all other laundry.  S/he will also perform minor repairs when necessary, and will keep my jewelry, shoes, and handbags in good condition.

I feel like there must be people out there who do this stuff.  Celebrities, for example, probably don't have too much time to deal with their clothes, and they always have to look fabulous.  I bet some of them hire people to help.

Pants Length

Today I was worried that my pants are too long.  I know jeans are supposed to "break" around your ankle, but I thought it looked weird with work pants.

This "Guide to Pants Length" is informative.  According to the Guide, some bunching/bulging around the break is preferable to having the whole shoe exposed.  I'm still not sure I agree (the "PANTS TOO SHORT FOR FLATS" look cleaner to me than the "PROPER PANT LENGTH FOR FLATS"), but it's nice to know that I'm not clearly in the wrong.

Introverts at school

Do you think introverted kids have a harder time in school without realizing why?

I was just thinking about K's schedule and realizing that, for most of his day, he has no opportunity to be alone. Not that I think this bothers him... but it would bother me.

Sleep Cycle Alarm Clock

I wonder if this really works.  For $0.99, it may be worth a try.

4/30/12 update: This actually seems to work.  Here is my sleep cycle from Thursday:

Apparently I woke up twice in the middle of the night, which I don't remember, but I cycled in and out of deep sleep right on schedule.

Compare that with last night's sleep cycle:

I slept terribly last night.  It was one of those nights where you feel like you're lying half awake for hours at a time, and I remember irritably requesting that S "stop blowing air on my face" at least twice (maybe around 3 AM and 4 AM?).

Anyway, I'm pretty impressed that this 99-cent app was so clearly able to log the difference between a good night's sleep and a bad night's sleep.

Katie Roiphe on the childfree

I don't know why I read anything by Katie Roiphe. Everything she writes just pisses me off.

This article about attitudes toward people who choose to be childfree starts off okay, but then she concludes:

The semi-moral imperative to grow up does seem sort of arbitrary and unfair. After all, why should you have to grow up if you don't want to? Why do we feel the need to impose or foist this very particular variety of grown up life on other people?  It seems likely that there is an element of envy in those who have taken on responsible, burdened, parenting lives. . . . [T]hat freedom can be something of a reproach, if we are honest. If we weren't taking this freedom personally, as a sort of criticism of dullness or drabness or routine, a kind of red pencil in the margins of our more mundane stories, we would be a little better, as a culture, at letting the childless (or as Badinter calls them, "the childfree") go in peace.

First of all, implying that people choose not to have kids so they don't have to "grow up," or that you can't be a "grown-up" without kids, is just another way of saying that it's somehow selfish or irresponsible not to have kids.

And then, saying that there's so much societal pressure to have kids because those of with us kids envy those without, doesn't make sense. I'm sure that to some extent, nearly all parents envy the freedom of their peers without kids. But it doesn't follow that because of that envy, parents would pressure others to become parents. There is so much history and context here that she ignores.

Beat-Beat Revelation

Did you know there's a dance battle movie based on Dance Dance Revolution?

The trailer is really... special.

Skipping

Did you know there is a skipping movement?

Doctor's Wife

Did you know there is an entire blog community of doctor's wives? (Check out the blogroll on that site.)

So tell me if this is weird...

I have a coworker in the office next to mine who is a kind-of friend, but not a close friend.  This morning when I came in, I noticed that a bag of nuts I keep in my drawer was out on top of my desk.  The coworker came in and told me he had gotten hungry and eaten some.  At the time, I didn't think much of it, since I always give him snacks when he comes in complaining of hunger anyway.

But then I realized that he must have gone through my drawers looking for a snack when I wasn't here.  Which weirds me out.  I mean, is it just me, or is it crossing a line to go digging through the office drawers of a coworker when he/she's not around?  Am I being oversensitive?

We have had run-ins over boundary issues before.  This guy also had a habit of coming into my office, walking around my desk, and peering over my shoulder at the emails and IM boxes open on my computer screen.  "So, you're emailing X paralegal [whom he doesn't get along with]?  Why?"  "Oh, you're chatting with Y?  What about?"  Eventually I told him he shouldn't do that, that people's conversations/emails are private unless he's invited to look at them.  Maybe we'll have to have a similar conversation about this.

Rocking bed

I want this bed.  And a sleeping porch to put it on.

Black History Month comedy roundtable

Roundtable discussion with a group of black stand-up comedians. (Yes, I know it's not Black History Month anymore.)

Alone, together

This article made me think of that conversation we had about the joys of having one's own space.  Imagine having that AND being happily married.

I wouldn't want an entire home separate from S's, but from our limited experience, having some spaces to ourselves within our home does make things a LOT easier.  Especially if one is fastidious about things like sopping wet bathmats and trash on the floor, and the other is not.

October Baby

Article about the "Christian" propaganda movie October Baby, about a child somehow born perfectly healthy after a "botched abortion" (don't those usually end up with the woman dying??) who, as a teenager, goes looking for her birth mother with the help of the abortion nurse who recalls with specificity what the mother said and did and her motivations for getting an abortion (she wanted an education! and a career!). Her birth mother, of course, is a fancy lawyer with a fancy car who denies ever having her and slams the door in her face, but later tearfully repents.

DISGUSTING.

How can you call yourself a Christian and have so little compassion that you cannot comprehend someone feeling like they are forced to make this difficult decision? Often because of their poverty, their other kids with special needs, domestic abuse in their home, or other circumstances that back them into a corner... not necessarily because they're just too busy and important. You may disagree that they have the right to make the decision, but to portray it as pure selfishness (and shoehorn in judgment about women pursuing careers) is appalling.

Face transplants

Currently reading this book about a burn victim who gets a face transplant (thank you Kindle library and your random selections).  Now morbidly obsessed with face transplants, and wondering what it would be like to wear the face of someone who has died, or have someone else wear mine after my death.

The endless debate about toe-revealing shoes in a law firm

Manolo says, the Manolo has often noted that, strangely, even the most staid lawyer can be driven mad by the glimpse of succulent toe flesh, which is why sandals have never been considered to be the proper business attire.

Housewives for Working Moms

This is an interesting post.

In a nutshell: "So here’s my advice to women who want a big career and a stable family: You need to earn a lot of money to make that happen."

Women and fashion

"Trends are the lingua franca of fashion. To understand them—and to articulate them by wearing them—emits a signal of membership." A Man's Guide to a Woman's Wardrobe.

8 Ways Women Undermine Themselves with Their Words

I do all these things. :(

Meat Spin

My brother and sister made me go to a website called meatspin.com (NSFW!!!!!!!!).  Now I have a thumbnail of it as a "Top Site" on my computer Dashboard, and can't figure out how to get rid of it. :(

Other than that, it has been a ton of fun spending time with the siblings in New York.  Tonight we are getting halal from the famous cart downstairs!

Aging voices

Kids' voices change all the time, because their bodies are changing. And you can usually detect signs of age in the voices of the elderly. What about in between? I wonder if there are any subtle differences that happen as we age, that if we knew what to look for, we could tell a 30-year old's voice from a 60-year old's voice.

Good Friday

Did you know that for lots of people, Good Friday is a holiday? Even the stock exchanges are closed. I had no idea.

Mug Innovation

Every time I unload the dishwasher, I wonder why more mugs aren't like this Ikea one.

The Case for an Older Woman

All the OKTrends pieces make great reading. I recently came across this one called "The Case for an Older Woman" (where they argue that more men should consider dating women in their 30s).

___ do it like ___

This AskMe thread is pretty funny.

A College of Magics

A friend recommended this book, A College of Magics by Caroline Stevermer. It's about young girls who are sent to a finishing school and end up illicitly learning magic there, and then it seems like it turns into an adventure/romance story when one of them tries to claim her rightful place on the throne. I don't share many of her literary tastes (she is really into English history) but this looks like it could be a fun read. It's out of print, but I may look for it at the library.

ASMR

Have you heard of this?  I haven't, which is surprising, since it sounds like it's pretty common.  This page gives some more info.

I wouldn't know how to separate this from the normal pleasant "chills down the spine" phenomenon from enjoying certain art/music or being touched on the head or back.  Wait... everyone does get those chills down the spine, right?  Or do I have ASMR?

Open adoption

Roundup of blog posts on open adoption. Common theme: It can be difficult, but it's worth it because otherwise you're not acknowledging something that is likely to be very important to your child. One blogger made the point that if she weren't open about it, her daughter would probably feel she couldn't ask and would resent her parents for it.

Bacon everything!

Bacon Weather.
Bacon Brown.
Bacon Bacon.

My favorite is Bacon Brown because of the huge "Newly found protein" caption underneath.

And ooh, look at this:
Bacon Magic Trousers.

Highbrow-lowbrow

Did you know Art Spiegelman used to draw Garbage Pail Kids?

Startled

... is how I felt this morning when I walked out of the bedroom and saw a man standing on our second floor balcony, staring at me.  It took me a moment to realize that it must have something to do with the repainting of our building.  I thanked my lucky stars that I was in my bathrobe, given my slovenly habit of wandering through the house in various states of undress.

Chaos Walking

Today's Amazon Daily Deal for Kindle offered this young adult trilogy for just $3.  According to the Booklist Review:


" Chased by a madman preacher and possibly the rest of his townsfolk as well, young Todd Hewitt flees his settlement on a planet where war with the natives has killed all the women and infected the men with a germ that broadcasts their thoughts aloud for all to hear. This cacophanous thought-cloud is known as Noise and is rendered with startling effectiveness on the page. The first of many secrets is revealed when Todd discovers an unsettling hole in the Noise, and quickly realizes that he lives in a much different world than the one he thought he did. Some of the central conceits of the drama can be hard to swallow, but the pure inventiveness and excitement of the telling more than make up for it. Narrated in a sort of pidgin English with crack dramatic and comic timing by Todd and featuring one of the finest talking-dog characters anywhere, this troubling, unforgettable opener to the Chaos Walking trilogy is a penetrating look at the ways in which we reveal ourselves to one another, and what it takes to be a man in a society gone horribly wrong. The cliffhanger ending is as effective as a shot to the gut. "


It sounds like it could be either great or terribly bad.  I bought it.

Draw Something

Do you play this?  If not, you should.  With me.

Sleep No More

Have you heard of Sleep No More? It's an immersive theater experience based on Macbeth, where you follow around various characters and see what happen to them, and occasionally they engage you in the story. You can also poke around and explore, opening drawers, reading letters, etc. It sounds amazing, although creepy (given the subject matter). Sadly, it's no longer in Boston.

Bon Appetit food lover's cleanse

Doesn't this sound good? Seems like it involves a lot of advance planning and cooking, though.

My Nordstrom Personal Stylist Experience

In short: fun, but not the miracle I had hoped.

I went last Saturday.  It only took a couple days after filling out the website form to get an appointment.  I also responded to an email asking for my clothing sizes, budget ($300-$500), and goals for the session (mine was to acquire a smart casual/dress casual wardrobe -- I think I said I was specifically interested in a few good basic pieces that could be mixed and matched for "a nice dinner party or a wine-tasting weekend with friends").

Nordstrom has a nice Personal Stylist section with big, well-lit dressing rooms.  My stylist had already pulled a bunch of clothes for me to try on when I got there.  A lot of the clothes were not really in my comfort zone (tight white jeans, voluminous tops, striped jersey blazers, gold-trimmed high heeled wedges), or in a color palette that I generally think of as flattering on me, but I figured what the hell, the whole point was to broaden my clothing horizons.  So I tried on pretty much everything.  Sadly, I did not magically come to believe that leggings-like pants and giant tops are my look, although they are apparently "on trend," in the words of my stylist.  She spent a lot of time sweetly trying to convince me that they looked fine on me and that I have nothing to be self-conscious about, when I should probably have been more assertive and said, well, it's nice that you think so, but I'd really like to try some different profiles.

I also tried on some dresses and liked them before realizing that they were all $400-500.  "Uh, that's a little out of my price range -- I might pay $200 for something I love, but that's pretty much my upper limit," I told the stylist.  She said that was good to know, and whisked away the designer dresses and replaced them with ones more in the $100-$200 range.  In general, we did better with the dresses than with the tight pants/huge top separates.  But I felt like a lot of them weren't flattering in one aspect or another, and, well, anything over $100 should make you feel like a rock star, right?  I did find one red dress that I loved and thought was worth the $118 price tag.

After about two and a half hours and trying on maybe thirty pieces of clothing, I left with the red dress and an oatmeal-colored sheer sweater thing.  My stylist and I both felt that we'd disappointed the other -- she asked for feedback and said she was sad that I hadn't left with a bunch of clothes that I loved, and I felt guilty that I'd spent 2.5 hours of her time on something that wasn't going to make her much of a commission.  I did like her a lot on a personal level and would consider going back to her again with more defined wardrobe goals.  And/or maybe I'll give Macy's a try instead -- it seems like part of the problem was that I have a hard time swallowing Nordstrom prices (I mean, their "low" prices are still over $100 for a lot of things).

In general, I left feeling like it had been interesting and worth the experience, but that I would probably have come home with more clothes if I'd gone shopping on my own.  It's true that those clothes would not have been particularly stylish, but I think for me, it might be better to take baby steps.  A little more trendy at a time, a little more expensive at a time.  Being plunged into Nordstrom fashionville was possibly just a bit too much.

Being by yourself

I was reading something about how people should appreciate being by themselves, rather than feeling lonely, and that you should do things you enjoy when you're alone. I liked this example: you might think it's not worth the bother to cook a nice meal just for yourself, and instead you eat a peanut butter sandwich and then watch TV while thinking negative thoughts about how you're a loser for being at home alone. But if you were on a date with someone you really liked, would you eat a peanut butter sandwich with them, stare at the TV, and insult each other? You wouldn't treat someone you liked that way, so why treat yourself that way?

Posthumous

I came across this posthumously written blog post. The post is beautiful, but the comments are hateful. (The writer emphatically said there is no afterlife, and somehow all these rabidly religious people found this post and wrote things like "he will burn in hell.") I'm surprised the family left the comments there.

Thank you form letter

I recently received an entirely preprinted wedding thank-you note. Not even a handwritten signature! I'm usually not the etiquette police, and this is a dear friend, but I'm going to say it: TACKY. 

Horse's mouth

My dentist told me that horses have rounded teeth, but they grind their teeth flat as they age. I looked this up to verify and I'm not sure it's entirely accurate, but horses do have something like six different sets of teeth. The point is, you can tell a horse's approximate age by looking in its mouth, which is why you shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. Also, I think the later sets of teeth are longer, so old horses are long in the tooth.

Fashion training

Last time I went shopping with her, my mom told me I should make it a priority to go to high-end clothing stores once in a while to look around and "train my eye."  This is actually great advice.  Part of why I hate clothes shopping is because I have no idea how to put outfits together and how to decide whether a piece "works" or not.  But I had never thought of style as a matter of training.

Thinking more on it, I realize that I used to feel the same way about home decoration.  But after months of perusing home design blogs, I have a better idea now of why things work/don't work, and how to put together a look I like.  Which is evidence that my mom is absolutely right: these things don't just happen by osmosis, but they can happen if you spend the time to train your eye.  Being as fashion-backward as I am is not a matter of natural limitation, but of laziness, if you will.  This was somewhat empowering to realize (even if I continue to be frumpy, at least it's a choice!).  Another point for the wisdom of moms.

Human birdwings

If this is for real, it's pretty awesome.  I think everyone has daydreamed about flapping their arms and soaring up into the air.  With that giant wingspan, though, I wonder how much arm strength it would take to get off the ground.

Reading speed

This is kind of fun.  It tells you how many words you read per minute, and then tells you approximately how many books you can read on one battery charge of your eReader.  It also tells you how long it should take to read any of a number of books.  For example, I should be able to read Tolstoy's "War and Peace" in 12 hours and 48 minutes.  After my terrible experience with Anna Karenina, no thanks, I'd rather have the 12 hours and 48 minutes.

... And then you die.

Why would anyone want this??  It's pretty much saying, "You might as well have fun now because you're going to die soon."  I would not want that reminder on my walls.

The lure of Javascript

Argh! Stayed up until midnight coding. What is wrong with me?
(It all started when I was trying to plan my picture wall and wished I had some online graph paper so I could easily click on a grid and see what my picture layout would look like...)
On the plus side, it worked, which was pretty satisfying.
Good night.

To iPhone or not to iPhone

I've spent a substantial chunk of today musing over whether I want an iPhone.  Basically, I only want it for the games.  Which makes it hard to justify switching to a phone plan that costs $40 more per month than my current phone plan.  So maybe I should just get an iPod Touch?  I could go to the Apple store on the way home from work and have it in my hands by this evening!  But then I will be carrying around a phone AND a Blackberry AND an iPod Touch.  Decisions, decisions.  Even frivolous decisions take up so much mental space.

Cupcake ATM

The person at Sprinkles who came up with the idea of the cupcake ATM is an absolute marketing genius. I had never even heard of Sprinkles before I started seeing news items about this pop up EVERYWHERE. People are seriously excited about what is basically a vending machine.

Ideal Bookshelf

I like this idea -- painting portraits of people through the spines of their favorite books.  A custom portrait would be a great present for a reader.

If you were rich, you could commission a portrait every year of the books you'd read that year.  Wouldn't that make a fun gallery?  And so much less pressure than trying to think of THE handful of volumes that "changed your life, or helped make you who you are today."

Worms

One of the sinks in the women's bathroom here always has these tiny black worms in it.  Google indicates that they are probably the larvae of drain flies, which live on rotting organic matter in drains (I knew it was a bad idea for that coworker to throw soup into the sink!).

Icky as drain flies are, I'll take them over my sister's theory, which was that someone was spitting worms into the sink.

Digested reads

Check out this Guardian series, "Digested read." The author condenses books into about two pages. Here's the digested version of David Copperfield.

Junk Mail

...I am heartily sick of it.  It seems like every company from which I've ever bought anything sends daily emails and weekly catalogs.  Also companies I've never bought anything from and have no interest in (I'm talking to you, AT&T U-verse).  Lately I've been trying to regain control by unsubscribing from email lists and actively contacting companies to ask to be removed from catalog mailing lists.  It's helping.  But I really wish there were a way to opt in/out of all those bulky, paper-wasting catalog mailings before they started showing up on the doorstep.

Related, but not really: I get a TON of junk email offering to grow my male member to astounding proportions.  Why?  Should I start feeling inadequate?

Infants

Reading this Ask Metafilter post about how to get an infant to sleep on his back brought me back to less than a year ago, when I was totally freaked out by a comment on some baby website about how a woman's five-month old baby, whose babysitter had swaddled him to get him to sleep, flipped over, couldn't turn back over because of his swaddle, and was dead by the time she came home. X was exactly that age when I read that.

Infants are so fragile. I'm so glad I don't have to worry about him randomly dying anymore.

Online dating

Online dating horror stories. (I've only read a few of these so far -- saving them for the weekend.)

I always thought online dating would be kind of fun, but in practice I bet it would be 99% people I kind of hated.

BE NICE

On the bus this morning (stupid Volvo!) I saw a sign, where the ads usually go, saying, "BE NICE. MBTA drivers are people too! They are helping you get where you are going. Please be nice to them. RIDE WITH RESPECT." It had a picture of a smiling bus driver. Isn't that sad?

Home is where the heart is

You know how there comes a point in every vacation where you kind of just want to go home?  I think I'm at that point.  I've had a great time, hung out with a bunch of friends, spent quality time with my sister, and eaten lots of fantastic food... but it's time to get back to normal life.  Eating out and getting drinks every night, sleeping on someone else's floor, living in an apartment with three roommates... all fun for a while, but I'm starting to long for S and the quiet comforts of our own space/routine.  Since I'm leaving tomorrow, I guess that makes this trip just about the perfect length.

Hi-ho a derry-o, the Barber of Seville

We're going to see The Barber of Seville on Friday! I don't think I have ever paid to see an opera before.

I don't know anything about the plot or the characters -- do you think I should look it up before we go so I have some context, or would we enjoy it more if it's a surprise? I think the theater will have an English translation displayed on a screen.

Special K

... is supposed to be healthy, right?  It has 25% DV of fiber.  But it must be 95% sugar.  How do people eat this stuff?  It is SO SUGARY.  I took two bites and already have a sugar headache.

Oishii

I didn't realize how much I've been craving Japanese food until coming back to New York.  Tonight I'm having sushi with a friend.  Tomorrow I'm having a fancy Japanese kaiseki dinner with a bunch of friends (and possibly a sister).  We are planning to get onigiri for lunch sometime this week.  And I will probably push for more Japanese food on Thursday night too.  That's seriously all I want to eat.

$4.41/gallon

... is how much I paid for gas last night.  I am in a mild state of shock.  Since we bike pretty much everywhere, I've only filled my gas tank a handful of times since moving here -- so to me it seems like the price jumps by $1 every time I pull into a gas station.

Happy Birthday K and X!

Here's to a wonderful first shared birthday (although I guess K's 4th and X's 0th were shared, sort of.  With maybe a little more focus on X).

Living Alone

Yesterday, I had a conversation with a friend who has never lived with a significant other.  He said that he would find it hard to give up the privacy of living alone.  I commented that, to my mind, the biggest change is always having to take the other person's needs into account.  As in, it's no longer just about when you're hungry, bored, sleepy, busy, sad, etc. -- you have to factor in if/when the other person is hungry, bored, sleepy, busy, sad, etc. as well.  "That's it," said my friend.  "I'm never moving in with someone else."

By pure coincidence, I stumbled over this article today.  Apparently living alone is a big topic right now.  The article itself, though, was kind of silly -- as many of the commenters point out, the "quirks" mentioned are not particularly quirky.  I get the convenience points (it's true that living together probably makes for more regular mealtimes and sharing a bed with the other person), but it's a bit sad that the article implies that habits like, say, talking to your cat, or singing Journey songs in the shower, are unfit for another person's presence.  How much do these people think you have to censor yourself around your nearest and dearest?  In particular, I read the bit about standing naked in the kitchen and eating peanut butter out of the jar, and thought, "I'm sure I've done that before -- and S hasn't batted an eyelid."  And why should he??

Quilled paper

Today I learned a new word: quilling.

(Being more crafty than me, you may already be familiar with this.)

When I See You Smile

A friend sent me this link today.  This led to a question of whether dogs smile.  After some brief research, it appears that the short answer is: no, not like humans do.  Although this dog may disagree.

Standing on one foot

I read something about how it's really good for you physically to stand on one foot. So whenever I think of it, when I'm brushing my teeth, or reviewing a contract, or doing the dishes or whatever, I've been standing on one foot.

I like it. It makes me concentrate on whatever I'm doing, and I feel like I'm helping my balance.

If the End Is Right, It Justifies the Beans

What's a good thing to do with black beans and/or garbanzo beans?  We just got a ton of both in our farmshare box.  We hardly ever cook with legumes, so I'm at a loss.

Junk drawer

I hate this junk drawer photo. What really bothers me about it is the plastic bags or plastic wrap sitting on top. I'm not saying this to trash the photo as art, I just have a visceral negative reaction to it. I'm always trying to organize, and I would hate having a reminder on my wall about the junk we have stashed away. Maybe I've spent too much time looking at pictures of perfectly put away rooms and I can no longer tolerate reality.

Elevenses

This article says that the ideal of an eight-consecutive-hour chunk of sleep is relatively new, and suggests that people naturally tend towards a pattern of "first sleep" and "second sleep" separated by an hour or two.  Kind of like hobbits' first breakfast and second breakfast.

Joe Decie

Aren't these drawings beautiful? By Joe Decie.

Sticky stick

My Google search for "stick with lots of things sticking out of it" got the most random results. Pears! Parakeets! Piercings! Warts in sensitive areas!

Turns out what I was looking for is a fiber optic wand. K used to have one as a baby and he was fascinated by it. But they all say they're not for kids under 3 or 5. Which I guess makes sense, right? They do have all those little things sticking out of them that could fall off. X will have to be stuck with these for his birthday.

Chromolume #7

We took my parents to SF MoMA yesterday (thanks CM and JW!).  Surprisingly, my favorite parts were the photography exhibits by Rineke Dijkstra and Francesca Woodman (I'm usually not too excited by photography).  We were lucky to go when we did -- the Rineke Dijkstra exhibit had just opened and it was the last day of the Francesca Woodman one.

I was particularly drawn to the Francesca Woodman works because most of them were from her time as a student at RISD, from 1975-1978 (go Providence!).  Sadly, she committed suicide a couple years later, at 22. Her works are mostly black and white photographs of herself in the nude.  My mom found them "creepy."  Which is precisely why I liked them.

Hair

Still learning how to manage my new haircut.

 

My hair has grown out enough that it keeps falling in my face. I shut my door for an hour so I could put on a hat.

 

I guess I need hairspray? Blech.

Art class

Miss Young's Art Room.

Jeremy Lin

This article about Jeremy Lin is interesting. The author basically says he wishes there could be an Asian-American role model who didn't fit the Asian-American stereotype. A pro basketball player definitely has potential, but Jeremy Lin is not enough of a badass off the court as this author would like.

Chinese by Marriage

My parents are in town and today was a total Relatives in the Area day.  The funny thing is, everyone kept on forgetting that Mr. Trousers does not speak Chinese.  I think every single person addressed him in Chinese at some point during the day, including me.

Photo book

I am determined to use that Groupon for a custom photo book before it expires on the 23rd. So, I've been putting together a book of K's and X's first years, side by side with pictures from the same months on opposing pages. Me with newborn K in a sling, me with newborn X in a sling. K in his tiger costume, X in the same tiger costume. They're not all like that, but I think I've done a pretty good job so far. It's fun seeing them at exactly the same developmental stage and seeing how alike they looked as babies. It is taking a loooong time, though, and the 23rd deadline means I'll miss X's first birthday. I think I'll print one for Nonna with an empty space for the party picture, and give it to her as a thank-you gift for hosting the party. Then I can add the party picture and print more for us and the grandparents. If I'm really ambitious, I could even make it into a real baby book with excerpts from my blog... but I doubt I'll ever complete that project. I'm going for good enough here.

Bundling

So apparently back in the day, there was this courtship ritual called "bundling," which meant... tucking a girl and boy in a bed together and leaving them for the night.   But sex was a big no-no -- in fact, the girl's parents would often sew her into something like a sleep sack for the night to discourage lewd behavior.  According to one website, "Proponents of bundling in bed felt that visiting on a couch presented far more temptation, although some courting also was done in that manner." 

Book club: The Buddha in the Attic

Finally figured out my Kindle problem and am reading The Buddha in the Attic! This line made me giggle:

One of us was distracted by the handsome Hindu man cutting asparagus in the next furrow over while she worked an all she could think of was how much she wanted to unravel his white turban from his enormous brown head. I dream of Gupta-san nightly.

I'm about a quarter of the way through the book, and I'm wondering: can she really sustain this multiple-first-party narration for the whole book? How can you have a plot that is happening to a boatful of people at once, after they get off the boat?

I also wonder where she got these stories from. The book reads like the collected diaries of a few dozen women. Did she actually have these, or is it mostly imagined? I guess all will be revealed in the endnote, or at least by post-book Googling.

Right now I'm at the part where she describes how the tireless Japanese farm workers, who put up with abuse, barely ate or slept, and worked themselves sick for their paltry wages, were victims of violence because they were an "unstoppable economic machine" taking over American agriculture. Sounds like a familiar story.

Mo' Money Mo' Issues

Thinking about that advice-for-folks-in-their-30's list and the ubiquitous advice to save more money.  This is something I've been pondering for a while.  I often feel conflicting urges both to save more money and to spend more money.  The urge to save is pretty straightforward -- we need to save for a house!  And in case one or both of us make a career change!  And for unexpected circumstances!  And so forth.  But these days, I'm also trying to loosen my natural savings bent when it comes to certain things, especially experiences.  I tell myself that you can earn back the money, but you can't necessarily get back the opportunity.  To have the means and the freedom and the health to go do fun things... well, maybe taking advantage of that fleeting confluence of factors is more important than the money.  For now.  But... house!  Maybe the trick is to spend more on experiences and less on everything else.

I kind of miss the days back in grad school when I had no money and thus didn't have to worry about what to do with it.

What to do now

This Ask Metafilter thread about what 40-year olds wish they had done in their 30s is interesting. Recurring themes include staying physically fit and saving money.

Money

I am freaking out a little over the amount of money we've been spending.
We spend about 80% of my take-home salary each month (in the wintertime) on just daycare, mortgage, and oil heat. Scary.
We're going to skip Disney, by the way. We told K we'd wait until he was older and he was okay with it.

Speed

Last Friday morning, I managed to lock myself out of the house with no bike or car keys.  So I had to walk to work.  It only took 45 minutes, which surprised me because I usually budget 30 minutes to bike to work and I know I bike more than 1.5 times faster than I walk.  I'm slow, but not that slow.

So today I timed my bike ride from the moment I started pedaling to the moment I entered the door of the bike cage at work.  The total came to 18 minutes, a few of which were spent at stoplights, so I'm going to say 15 minutes.  Biking speed of 3x walking speed is more believable, and much better for my biking ego.  This also tells me that I have to find a way to cut down my pre- and post-biking routines of getting my helmet, pant straps, gloves, one-eared iPod setup, and sunglasses just so before heading out, and putting everything away when I get to the destination -- these things should not take ten minutes.

Die Antwoord

I confess, I'm a bit obsessed with Die Antwoord.

Here they are performing live on Letterman.

Breadwinning

This Time article says that men are more likely to cheat on women who outearn them.  One sentence that caught my attention was this one: "[The study] found that men who were completely dependent on their wives' incomes were five times likelier to cheat than those who contributed the same amount to the household finances."

It seems to me that many men who fall into the "completely dependent on their wives' incomes" category could have reasons for cheating that have nothing to do with the psychological effects of income disparity.  If a man isn't contributing anything to the household finances (and isn't in school, or a stay-at-home dad, or working an unpaid job, or looking for a new job), maybe he's bored.  Maybe a bored man with a lot of time on his hands is more likely to cheat than a man who is busy at work all day.

Also, isn't it possible that some of these men are with these women because of their incomes?  Maybe a guy has an older sugar mama and also gets some action on the side.  Again, the cheating may not be a direct result of the income disparity.

But putting all of that aside, based on this and other articles I've seen, it seems that people do expect problems to arise in relationships where the woman makes more than the man.  I wonder if the problems stem more from the women's expectations or the men's expectations.

P.S. The article also says that men who make a lot more money than their wives are also more inclined to cheat.  Maybe the article should just be called "Some Men Cheat!"

Map

I'm tempted to get this map for K's room.

Disney

After telling us we should come visit them in Florida anytime, and that it didn't matter if we overlapped with other visitors, now my mom is asking us to change our already-purchased plane tickets because there will be too many people in the house at once. ARGH.

So I thought instead of shelling out to change the tickets, we could use that money to take a family trip to Disney and arrive a few days later at my parent's place.

Do you know how much it will cost for the four of us to visit Disney World for two days, not including food, hotels, or parking? $620!!!

Now I understand why I only went there once as a kid. I think it would be a great experience for K, but once we add a hotel room and car rental it will be well over $1000!

It seems like a waste to go to FL and not visit Disney, but I did not expect that it would be such a huge added expense. (Also, we're flying into Tampa, so it'll be an additional 2-hour drive to Disney.)

Article

Interesting article about Maggie Gallagher in Salon.com today.

Maybe it would be different if I read more and kept up with the news more, but I find it hard to wrap my head around people's reasons for objecting to gay marriage (especially if those reasons are non-religious).  Articles like this one provide interesting insights.

Goodreads

Too often, I pick up a book and get as far as 75% of the way through it before realizing that I have read it before.  So I decided to start keeping track of the books I've read.  Some people have suggested Goodreads as a nice way to keep track of leisure reading -- you can queue books you're planning to read (right now my Amazon cart fulfills this function for me), list books you have read, and read and write reviews on books.  I already have an account -- maybe it's time to start using it.

Black tie for women roundup

Forbes says a little black dress, rhinestone chandelier earrings, and false eyelashes. Strangely specific, no?
Shes Daily says a black strapless dress.
This City Data forum says a cocktail-length black dress and subtle jewelry.
Ask Metafilter says a floor-length or cocktail-length dress.
Black Tie Guide offers some helpful hints:

• Debrett's  (UK) says "any level of dress, ranging from a little lycra number to just sub-white-tie levels of splendour."
• Emily Post's Etiquette says a "formal evening dress or short, dressy cocktail dress" but not separates
• Letitia Baldrige says "floor-length, short, or three-quarter-length evening gown; evening sandals or pumps; and an evening bag of silk, satin, peau de soie, velvet, or brocade material; jewelry – same as for cocktail party [sparkly earrings and bracelet or simple button earrings and a very simple gold or silver necklace], only slightly more of it; and a fur, if you have one."

The consensus seems to be that you should look dressed-up and elegant but there is a wide range of acceptable formal wear that can be considered "black tie" for women.

Again with the Milk Liqueur

So, brown sugar milk liqueur >> white sugar milk liqueur.  White sugar milk liqueur is pleasantly smooth and creamy, but not very flavorful.  Brown sugar milk liqueur, on the other hand, tastes like caramel.

Tonight I set up a ginger/vanilla bean/nutmeg/brown sugar variant -- we'll see how that goes.  I'm a bit worried that the flavorings will be too strong after ten days.

Wuthering Heights

Wuthering Heights is terrible. The characters are completely unlikable. They're just a bunch of jerks being jerks to each other. Plus there are about three different narrators, but they have identical narrative voices.

Anyway, now I can start "The Buddha in the Attic."

Horrific

The terrible story of the Powells is on my mind today...

Most useless Internet comments ever

They all start with, "I'm not a lawyer, but I think..."

Macabre

I learned today that it is a tradition in Taiwan to dig up the bodies of loved ones ten years after they've been buried, and sort the bones into an urn, which is then reburied.  This is also considered a convenient time to regain the jewelry that has been buried with the dead so that it can go back into use among the living.  Some stones, such as jade, are thought to become more beautiful the more times they go through this cycle.

Unexpected Knowledge, and Slime Eels Revisited

In my crossword this morning, one of the clues was "Glacial deposit."  I skipped over this one for a while, but once I got the first letter (M) and the last two letters (N, E), I said to myself, "Ah, moraine!" and filled it in.  And then got to wondering how I knew that word.  I know nothing about glaciers and am not very well read at all when it comes to anything other than fiction.  But I feel like knowing things you didn't know you knew is something that increases with age.  We're exposed to so much information, everywhere, all the time.  I guess what we're actively thinking about represents giant chunks of what goes into our minds, but how much of the ambient noise drifts into the spaces between the giant chunks?  Do we know much more than we think we do?  How much is "intuition" simply putting together all the things we don't realize we know?

It also makes you wonder, nostalgically, what it must feel like to be a child young enough not to have odd bits of information crammed into the nooks and crannies of your brain, and to know what you know.  Like the difference between living in your first out-of-college apartment with all of your worldly goods in plain sight, versus having a house you'd lived in for, say, 35 years, and finding a soup ladle you can't even remember buying in a box in the basement.

Also, did you know that some people eat slime eel slime?  Wikipedia says that in some cultures, people keep slime eels in containers which they then beat with a stick so that the eels continuously produce slime.  The slime is used in a manner similar to egg whites.

X is allergic to egg whites!

Good thing we had Benadryl on hand.

Somebody who scoffed at baby food restrictions is now feeling sorry.

Work Productivity

Something I've realized recently is that when I catch myself unable to work, and desperately grabbing at distractions (e.g., online shopping, crosswords, blog reading) to avoid turning back to work, 75% of the time it's because I'm physically uncomfortable in some way.  (The other 25% of the time I chalk up to pure mental laziness.)  Sometimes all I need is to take a minute and stretch, put on/take off a warm sweater, drink some water, eat a handful of snack, go to the bathroom, and/or take a short nap under my desk.  Then it seems much easier to turn to the task at hand.  I try to remind myself of this often.

Today, though, falls under that 25%.

Book club

I need to go back to drafting contracts instead of reading this. (However, I will be faithfully reading until his project is complete.)

Sisterly Threes

I've been watching that PBS show Downton Abbey, which features three aristocratic sisters.  I'm also reading a book called The Weird Sisters, which is about three (not so weird) sisters.  This seemed like a vaguely odd coincidence until I started thinking about how often sisters appear in sets of three -- King Lear, Cinderella, Inventing the Abbots, Charmed, Gone with the Wind, etc, etc.  Also, whenever sisters appear as a threesome, they take on predictable roles: the oldest sister is controlling, the middle sister either hates the oldest sister or sides with her against the youngest, and the youngest sister is lovable but often feckless.  I wonder how often these roles apply to three sisters in real life.  Is this just general birth order psychology?  Being one of three siblings myself, I guess it would be fair to say that I am the most controlling, little Sister Trousers and I do tend to gang up on baby Brother Trousers, and Brother Trousers is the most affable and feckless of the bunch.

Intern

Yesterday I met one of the new college interns. He asked me if I was an intern too.

I think I'm old enough now to consider that a compliment.

Skeet Skeet Skeet

My co-worker will not tell me what this mean.  I assume it is bad.

This came up in a conversation about songs so bad you look forward to hearing them.  My current favorite of the genre is Usher's "OMG," which has the following lines:

"Honey got a booty like pow, pow, pow.
Honey got some boobies like wow, oh, wow.
Girl you know I'm lovin' your, lovin' your style.
Check check ch-check ch-checkin' you out."

Wack-Ass Weekend

"I have this idea called 'Jamal and Tyrell and Omar and Brick and Michael's Wack-ass Weekend,' about this group of guys who get abducted by aliens on their way to the fights. I'm writing that now." -- Eddie Murphy